Lets face it, I’m not always the most loved person at VIVO. I get hate mail, glares, sarcastic comments and general bad behaviour. You might say that it could be the result of my own bad behaviour -if you dared that is! Or you could look into it a bit more and examine the circumstances, a touch of CSI if you will. I am usually the enforcer, the organiser, the realist. And that mostly brings out the worst in others. If you are under the assumption that you can come into VIVO and do what ever your little heart desires, please rethink this concept. The customer is not always right, and if you are occasionally right, its because it works for us at that time. Have I managed to destroy your fantasy?  Now lets talk about legs.

Obviously I get to see a lot of legs, but lately the legs have been a big issue. And legs tell a lot about a customer and there pending attitude. Its not about how they look – goodness knows mine are definitely on the ugly side which is why they are covered. Its about how they are utilised. We know this because we tend to trip over them a lot. Take Mr Lasagne – (he has Lasagne every single day), he sits down and sticks his legs out to the side. Way out to the side. And no matter what we say or how we say it, he wouldn’t move them. Until I tripped “accidently” and spilled a coffee on his legs. I said “sorry, didn’t expect your legs to be their.” Or anywhere except under the table and out of my way.

Then there is Mrs Large Latte with chocolate on top. She has hot legs. Always wears a mini and brings my bar service to a stand still. She sits at the table with about a 2 metre clearance in front. So that she can cross her legs and they are still clearly visible to the world, the male world to be exact. How dumb does she look trying to eat pasta. But then karma stepped in (not me I swear it!) and somebody bumped into her table and she dropped a forkful of spaghetti in her lap. Boy she moved fast.

And then there are short legs, cause they make trouble too, its not just the long ones. Mr Powerade comes in and loves to put his black rubber soled shoes on my white chairs. And rub them. He sees the marks he leaves and doesn’t care. I asked him politely to not do it anymore because of the marks but he just shrugged, mumbled something about short legs and did it anyway. I went over with the windex and sprayed his shoes and the chair. He was shocked. I think he yelped. I was just pre-soaking the area.

Now these are just a couple of examples, not the worst or the best. Just a cross section. A couple of stories about leg behaviour and how it can define you. Regardless of their shape or size they come with responsibility. Don’t let your legs get in the way of a good relationship with your local cafe. Or me. BTW, I never mentioned Mr Strong Flat White who comes in on his bike every morning. He has strong tanned legs, just like his coffee. He is always allowed to pop his legs where I can see them. They make me smile. Nice pins. Happy waitress.

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